Note to Myself before a Monday

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Even though tonight you don’t feel sad- especially because tonight you don’t feel sad, you had another special weekend, you accomplished goals and you feel so good about yourself, especially because of all of that, you should remember your darkest moments. Remember how they marked you, feel how the despair left scars inside you and how for so many nights you felt hopeless and drained of tears…void…remember all of that, so that you never forget how you managed to crawl your way out of that tunnel and even though you’re not all the way out, every day you see the light and feel its warmth approaching and you’re almost there. You can feel it.

Always remember that you have are a beautiful soul and your body is a great tool- it’s healthy and although some days you feel unattractive – you know what’s up…you’re flawless and not like Queen Bey, but like Maria-Steph…you’re flawless because you are kind and loving and you give a damn and now you’re finally learning to put yourself first. You’ve made it far, you should be proud, but you should also keep working towards your goals, because you made a promise that you must absolutely keep.

Remember the impact that stars have in your life, remember how you have told every single person who has touched your heart how incredibly amazing space and stars are to you and how they have thought of ways to give you the closest they can think of stars. Remember that people care and cared enough to make you feel that special, but most importantly, remember how when they have left, you kept the stars and used them to brighten up the darkness left behind. You were resourceful and compassionate with yourself.

When you’re sad, remember:

‘Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light; I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night’

-M.

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