I just found this on Berlin-ArtParasites, one of my favourite sites for a while now. This is the most relatable post I’ve ever come across, and that is saying a LOT considering that I find most of their posts extremely relatable. Just yesterday I complained about how feeling and caring so intensely can sometimes give you more pain than joy (I actually complain about this a lot) but I’m slowly starting to realise that no matter how hard I try, I simply can’t change it. It might be time to start embracing it, maybe it is what makes me, ME and authentic.
The reason why I love the way I do and why no matter how much someone hurts me I still believe in the good inside of them…call me naive, but I’ve seen the best and worst sides of people and even when they are showing me their worst or pushing me away, I can still see the amazing good in them, because it is so beautiful and unique. SO, yeah, I care and will care forever…I never know when I might just go and the thought of not telling the love of my life or that one person who was really nice to me once, even though I didn’t know them well- that they matter to me- that kills me a bit inside.
So, here it goes:
I love being horribly straightforward. I love sending reckless text messages (because how reckless can a form of digitized communication be?) and telling people I love them and telling people they are absolutely magical humans and I cannot believe they really exist. I love saying, Kiss me harder, and You’re a good person, and, You brighten my day. I live my life as straight-forward as possible.
Because one day, I might get hit by a bus.
Maybe it’s weird. Maybe it’s scary. Maybe it seems downright impossible to just be—to just let people know you want them, need them, feel like, in this very moment, you will die if you do not see them, hold them, touch them in some way whether its your feet on their thighs on the couch or your tongue in their mouth or your heart in their hands.
But there is nothing more beautiful than being desperate.
And there is nothing more risky than pretending not to care.
We are young and we are human and we are beautiful and we are not as in control as we think we are. We never know who needs us back. We never know the magic that can arise between ourselves and other humans.
We never know when the bus is coming.”
– Rachel C. Lewis