The more time passes, the older I get, the more people I let into my heart, the more people I say goodbye to, the more I learn that though difficult at times, this is absolutely okay:
‘Let whoever’s gonna arrive, arrive. Let whoever’s gonna leave, go. May whatever’s gonna hurt, hurt…may everything that has to happen, happen.’
…and may we become stronger and more human because of it.
Did I say that I loathe you?
I’ve been feeling kinda down and lost since the last time I wrote on here…it seems I’ve found myself wandering again…
Anyway, here it goes.
This January 1st, New year’s day, birthday, hangover day- whatever you want to call it, now takes on a new meaning- happiness. I said it to everyone who asked me about my New Year’s Resolution and I’ll say it again: to be happy- that’s all I want to be and all I am right now. Thank you all for your birthday wishes. I feel like someone who has been given a second chance at living a beautifully chaotic life and I’m down for that.
Wishing you a year full of adventure and Drake Cakes,
This is my first christmas season in the Dominican Republic in three years and it feels…weird. This is supposed to be ‘home’ but I think that the term ‘home’ became unfitting for this place exactly four years ago. London took over that term and I am well aware. I successfully cooked my first Christmas eve dinner single handedly in London, I fell in love for the first time in London, I found my second family- my tribe, in London. It was tough a lot of the times but I never regretted it.
Here I am at the end of a tumultuous year, finally feeling triumphant and balanced again and sure, it feels weird being back in this bubble for christmas, but it also doesn’t affect me like it would have done in the past. I have changed, grown, learnt, become stronger, let go of many of my fears, I have cried and felt despair, I have laughed uncontrollably and have found my mind wandering to new places and new faces and it finally feels like I am whole again.
I am honestly not even wishing for the new year to start, but I am enjoying what’s left of this one, because I wasted so much time not doing so. I welcome 2016 wholeheartedly and way stronger than I’ve ever been and happier to be me than I’ve ever been. So, bring on new challenges, new cities, jobs and even the possibility of another medical intervention before the year ends- it will be just fine.